-Girl! -Woman! -Madam? -Mistress ?! How to turn to a stranger on the street?

I stood in line at the checkout of the supermarket, behind me stood a girl not much younger than me (well, maybe 3-5 years old). Her companion approached her and she, pointing to me, informed him: "Here, stand behind this woman!" I already distorted the whole of these words. What woman am I to you! Well, think of it, I ran out to the store without makeup, and what if I looked like there was a slight touch of exhaustion from washing-cleaning-cooking-with children seats! This is not a reason to call names!

This upsetting incident happened to me almost a year ago, but I still remember that day as a nightmare, and since then I go to the store only after looking in the mirror for a subjectively objective assessment of my appearance.

And here is another case that I witnessed. In the shopping center, a cloakroom attendant (she looked 60-65 years old) received outerwear from visitors. A man of about 40, stretching out his coat, turned to her: "Girl, take it, please!" “What girl am I to you!” The cloakroomwoman angrily flashed. “I'm a grandmother already! What a habit it is to call all girls to death!” For a long time later, the grandmother's cloakroom worker could not calm down, all something grumbling displeasedly under her breath.

Familiar situations, isn't it? But the trouble is that in our country there is no universally accepted form of appeal to a woman or a girl. In England - Mrs. or Miss, in France - Madame or Mademoiselle, in Germany - Frau (formerly unmarried Fraulein, but now this treatment is outdated and is already used with irony), in Spain - seigneur or lord. But in Russia -…

The October Revolution, together with the abolition of the tsarist regime, abolished the forms of conversion of that time. Instead of polite and respectful "mistress", "madame" or "young lady" all became impersonal and sexless "comrades". The Soviet Union collapsed and the ill-fated "comrade" in the form of an appeal to women safely sunk into the summer.

But how now in modern Russia they turn to a woman? Here are the forms that researchers have identified.

Beauty! - Familiar treatment by men.
Woman! - Common, often causes resentment and protest.
Citizen! - An official appeal, more often used by the police.
Aunt! Grandmother! - Used by children.
Daughter! Daughter! - Appeal from the elderly.
Mother! - Rough, for older, simple women.
Sister! Sister! Countrywoman! - Familiar circulation, more often from men.
Darling! Pretty! - More often from the elderly, or as familiar.
Madame! - Used in the speech of representatives of the older generation, the intelligentsia.
Lady! - More often used with a negative connotation.
Madam! - Appeal used with kind attitude, respectful, (outdated).
Madam! - More often used in official applications (obsolete).

Yes, as they say, with all the wealth of choice, there is no other alternative. It turns out that it remains for us to return to the obsolete and almost forgotten appeals of imperial times? To find out, we conducted a survey among our readers. Questions were asked as follows:

Question 1: How do you prefer strangers to call you on the street (in a store, anywhere)?

Question 2: How often do you turn to you, and which appeal annoys you the most?

Question 3: How do you feel about the appeals: Madame, Lady, Lady, Young Lady, Ma'am?

As a result of the survey, it turned out that the most acceptable treatment is “girl” or depersonalized: “I'm sorry,” “sorry,” “please.”

Dulcedo, 23 years: "I prefer that the treatment of a stranger begins with the phrase" I apologize ... "and then" You ", without any clarification a la" girl "
Kristina, 20 years: "Usually they say -" Sorry, girl ... "It suits me perfectly."
Alexandra, 27 years: "From the phrase" I apologize ... "or" Sorry ... ", to you. If you need to specify the gender, then of course" Girl "is better."

Most respondents are categorically outraged by the appeal "woman" or when strangers turn to "you."

Lily, 33 years old: "It infuriates when a woman speaks. I am not yet at that age to hear" a woman "addressed to me!"
Ksenia, 39 years old: "Woman! Oh, I would kill! Fortunately, I rarely hear that."
Annie 27 years old: "Annoying when they start poking or touching a hand!"
Anna 30 years old: “Recently, they began to call a woman, and this is said by such aunts for whom I’m clearly a girl! Although, in principle, for example, a woman speaks to all the medical staff in the maternity hospital and this somehow doesn’t annoy. But on the street, when a woman is clearly much older, it’s somehow unpleasant. Although, between us, what’s offended? Thirty years old, two children, obviously not a girl anymore ... "

Concerning the appeals, “Madam,” “Madame,” or “young lady,” opinions were divided. Young readers between the ages of 17-29 consider such appeals to be strange, funny, or even annoying.

Anyuta, 27 years old: “I have a negative attitude to such appeals, since now it has more familiar connotations than a polite appeal to a woman / girl.”
Alexandra, 27 years old: “The Young Lady” and “Madam” sound very familiar and somewhat dismissive at the moment. Madame, modem and lady like it, but it will never take root on Russian soil. ”
Heron 17 years: "In my opinion, they sound strange. But I have nothing against."
Mysia 22 years old: "Annoying when these idiotic Ladies are being treated, Ma'am Young Lady Boyarynya ..."
Yuliya, 22 years old: "It’s very annoying, again, for some reason, associations are like the elderly maniacs are talking like that."
Aknes 21 years old: "It amuses me when women turn in a similar way, or rather" madam ". In most cases, I have a negative attitude to" young lady ", associations with those moments when ignoramuses want to poke your nose with your nose pop up."

Representatives of 30 years and older relate to such forms of treatment, on the contrary, quite tolerantly and calmly, and even welcome them as the most acceptable.

Svetlana, 37 years old: “Better“ madame. ”For some reason, a lady and a young lady in our cultural space are perceived as something mocking and derogatory. Such phrases are usually pronounced with a certain mockery.”
Larisa32 years old: “This is very rarely treated. So rarely that one can say that they don’t apply at all. It is more suitable for foreigners. But, in general, such treatment would probably not have caused me contempt or irritation.”
Catherine, 33 years old: “I wasn’t called a lady, I probably would have precipitated. Some sort of bdsm, ridiculous of course ... Well, again, if this appeal was somewhere at the hotel at the reception, I would take it normally "You can’t argue with etiquette, but if on a tram it means it’s pinned up, I wouldn’t like it. In a word, such calls are good, if appropriate."
Faustova, 46 years old: "I perceive these words with humor, sometimes I hear and answer in the same way, sir."

Summing up the results of our little research, we come to the disappointing conclusion that, unfortunately, we do not have acceptable to all, polite and respectful forms of appeal to the Russian representatives of the beautiful half of humanity. How then to be?

I propose to submit this issue to our State Duma for consideration! Experienced representatives of the people sit in the same place. Well, let them think in their Duma, maybe they’ll come up with something ...

Watch the video: Turning A Stranger Into A Supermodel (May 2024).